The Carving On The Wall
by PeanutButterJellyTots'nHobnobs
Summary: Percy can't deal with the pressure any more and can't find another way to cope with it, but struggles to leave Nico behind. Rated T for Major Character Death My first.. Hope you enjoy :)
1. Don't Go

**Chapter 1: Percy**

'You know I have to do this don't you?' I asked softly.

He nodded slowly, tears streaming down his cheeks, his hands clasping mine, refusing to look at me.

'I love you so much Neeks. But because I love you I have to do this.'

As I said it he shook his head furiously desperately trying to make me change my mind.

'If you loved me you wouldn't even think of doing it. I can't just sit here and watch you. You can't. Please'

'Nico… I don't want to. Can't you see that? But I have to. For us. So we can be together'

'But Percy, you might die and I would lose you forever. I can't live without you. You have so much to live for. There's your mum and Annabeth. Grover and Leo. Jason, Piper, Hazel, Frank, Chiron… So many people love you Perce and I'm not ready to let you go yet. Don't leave…'

Before he could say another word I leapt forward and pinned him against the sand, smashing my lips against his. For a minute he lay there just letting me kiss him but after a while he started to kiss back, deeper, licking my lips and asking for entry, tangling his hands in my hair the way he knows I like it. I smiled and pulled away still sitting on him so he couldn't move anywhere. He grabbed at me, trying to pull me back down but I resisted.

'I love you' I said trying to make him forget our previous conversation.

'I know you do' he replied somewhat irritated.

'Let's go out to dinner tonight. Just the two of us.'

'Sounds nice' he growled.

'And afterwards we can go see a movie'

'You're trying to distract me' he remarked.

'Or maybe we could go bowling?'

'Stop trying to distract me.'

'What about ice skating?'

'Stop trying to distract me.'

'Would you prefer a walk around Central Park? It's beautiful at night. If you ignore the weirdos who go there late.'

'Percy, just STOP' he shouted.

I cowered. Nico never shouts unless he's absolutely furious. If he's just angry then he will get quieter but he'll never shout. Especially at me.

'I know you're trying to make me forget but it won't work. You seem to be forgetting that I love you and it's pretty hard to love someone who's been ripped to shreds and scattered around you. You are one of the bravest, strongest people I know and you're a really good fighter. But think about it Perce. Everyone has one thing, one fatal flaw that you can't defeat. And I think this is yours. Better swordsmen than you have fought it and none of them around to tell the tale. You are amazing, beautiful and talented but I'm begging you Percy Jackson. If you do ignore me and fight this monster come back to me in one piece. Or if you really loved me you wouldn't go at all.'

I looked into Nico's eyes and saw the longing for me to stay but I couldn't. This is just one the things I had to do.

'I can't' I whispered.

Nico's onyx eyes flared and I swear for a moment I saw fire in his eyes before I was pushed off and into the water. He stood over me and I finally understood why so many people found him terrifying.

'Then you are dead to me' he said in an emotionless voice and walked back to the cabins and the bonfire where the rest of our friends were singing and having fun. I knew that in a few days time it wouldn't be like that. There would be no singing, only tears. No fire, just emptiness. But I had planned this for so long that I wasn't going to give up now.

A solitary tear slid down my face as I thought of what could have been.


	2. The Final Stand

**Chapter 2: Percy**

After a final check I was ready to go, prepared for what I was about to face. Riptide was safely inside my pocket but I knew I wouldn't be using it tonight. However I uncapped it one last time and started carving, tears falling as I wrote my final words.

The woods were dark and menacing. The branches seemed to be reaching over to smother me and as I walked further into the foliage it started to creep closer to me causing me to hack at them but to no avail.

I carried on walking, not with any real sense of direction until I came to a clearing and I knew that this was my final destination.

As the leaves rustled opposite me I tensed but made no move to arm myself. The figure kept moving forward until silhouettes turned into flesh and I was finally able to look at my opponent clearly. However I was surprised at what I saw.

'The mighty Perseus Jackson' echoed around the clearing louder than I thought was possible.

'Apparently' I replied coldly.

'Luke says his extremely sorry he couldn't make it as he would love to be here doing this himself, alas something stole his attention so he sent me instead.'

'And who's me?' I asked praying to the gods that my voice wouldn't shake.

'That is of no importance to you Mr Jackson' he said and his lips turned upwards into a half snarl, half smirk.

'You won't be around much longer to worry about it either.'

I nodded to myself and breathed deeply trying to relax and stay calm. I had planned this everything was prepared. Luke's minion was right. I didn't have to worry about anything for much longer.

We circled for a small amount of time; I might as well act the part while I'm here. Finally the stranger pulled his sword out staring at me and a look of confusion crossed his face.

'Is the famous Percy Jackson so sure of himself that he doesn't need a weapon?' he asked disbelievingly.

I pulled Riptide out of my pocket, uncapped it, and then threw it on the ground at my feet.

'I have no need for it' I muttered and looked down finally facing my fate.

'So be it'

I walked backwards until my feet found the roots of the tree and I leant against it.

The sword wielding soldier smiled, a sick sadistic grin, not believing that it could be this easy.

'Goodbye Perseus Jackson' he said and launched the celestial bronze dagger at me.

Just before it reached my stomach he shouted 'You are weak Jackson, and so very, very disappointing', shook his head and turned to the forest disappearing where he had appeared from only a few minutes before.

(3rd Person POV)

As the dagger pierced his stomach and pinned him to the tree his mind replayed all the great times in his life.

The birthdays his mum and him had spent together, the first campfire he ever went to at CampHalf Blood, the countless games of Capture the Flag. Meeting Annabeth and Grover as well as the countless others he had encountered over the years and became friends with. So many people, so many quests, so many good memories.

But the one thing that stood out was Nico. Their first kiss, the first time they had sex, moonlight walks down the beach, just staying in bed once in a while then getting told of by Chiron for skiving training.

The first time he said

'I love you Nico Di Angelo'

Percy's head slumped onto his chest a small smile on his face as his last memory was of his favourite person.

Somewhere in the distance a wolf howled, a baby cried and Nico Di Angelo turned in his bed.


	3. Why Did You Leave Us?

**Chapter 3: 3rd Person**

The next day according to the rest of the campers was nothing out of the ordinary. Percy wasn't there but that wasn't unusual either. He could have been sent on a last minute quest, he might have been called down to Poseidon's palace, he may just have been walking along the beach like he does each morning.

One boy in particular knew that the lost camper was not doing any of these activities and slipped away from the mess hall to the woods because he couldn't handle it any more. Percy had said he would be back by morning, like he'd never even gone anywhere. He had said he would come back in one piece. And so far he had broken all of these promises.

Nico stood up and left the woods deciding to go on a walk around camp when without even realising he was stood in front of Percy's cabin. Nico cursed to himself; couldn't he just let it go? Percy was probably just staying over night or had gotten delayed. Perhaps he'd even got called up to Olympus, Nico thought.

He relaxed at these thoughts and went into the cabin to get something he'd left behind. As he searched under the bed he noticed little flakes of something on the bed. Also the floor seemed to be covered in dust as well. Nico picked up one of the flakes and inspected it. Wood shavings?

He stood up and looked around the room trying to find where they had come from and gasped. On the wall, high up was a carved message from Percy himself

'Good bye Neeks. Love you forever'

He fell to the floor his legs unable to hold him up anymore. Tears started rushing down his face, enough tears to fill a swimming pool relentless and unstoppable.

Then the screaming started. The one solid thing that he could lean on was now gone forever. The person that calmed him down, the person who comforted him, the one that slept with him just so he wouldn't get nightmares. All gone.

Nico couldn't control his anger and swept his arms across Percy's table knocking everything on the floor, the sound of shattering glass like the sound of the ocean. The ocean, Nico screamed, shouted at the top of his lungs. That was Percy's home. Why didn't Poseidon save him? Any of the gods. His most treasured possession.

A child of Apollo walked past just as Nico started screaming and as soon as he heard the glass shatter he ran to get Chiron.

The centaur sprinted to the cabin closely followed by the other campers, Annabeth and Grover at the front, nosey busybodies at the back trying to push their way forwards.

As Chiron opened the door he saw the teenager lying in a mixture of blood and glass with tears streaking down his face. Even as the door opened Nico didn't stop, too overwhelmed with grief to do anything but.

Chiron looked up to where Nico was looking and saw the message. It felt like a slap across the face.

Percy Jackson, son of one of the Big Three, destroyer of Gaia, survivor of the underworld and one of the bravest people he had ever met (to the extent of foolishness at times) was dead. And not a hero's death dying in battle. Somehow he had planned this, knew he was going to die, maybe wanting to and left one measly little note carved in wood to say goodbye.

Chiron stepped outside to explain and get rid of all the inquisitive people outside. Once they had all left a few remained, Annabeth, Grover, Rachel and Jason.

'What's happening?'

'Tell us!'

'What's wrong with Nico?'

'Is Percy ok?'

'Where is he?'

'Was he here earlier?'

'Why is Nico screaming?'

'Why is he in Percy's cabin in the first place?'

'SILENCE!' Chiron bellowed.

'Nico found Percy's note' he explained.

'What note?'

'Why would Percy leave a note?'

'Was it for all of us?'

'Be quiet' whispered Annabeth

Chiron nodded understandingly. Tears started to run down her cheeks as Chiron's message finally sank in.

'No… Please no. Why?'

'Annabeth what's wrong?' asked Jason, concerned.

'What do you mean no?' asked Grover looking from Annabeth to Chiron then back again.

Annabeth spoke but her tears were choking her and she couldn't form any words.

'When do people often leave notes?' asked Annabeth finally.

'When they go on holiday?'

'When they go away for a long time?'

'When they… but Percy wouldn't do that!' Rachel said incredulously.

'Do what?' asked an irritated Jason

'Can one of you please just tell us?' asked Grover.

'Oh my goodness' whispered Rachel. 'Oh no.'

Chiron stepped back into the cabin in order to placate Nico and shook his head as he felt a film of tears glaze over his eyes.

Outside Jason and Grover were still not understanding and that made it worse for Annabeth and Rachel.

'I don't understand why he would just leave a note. I leave notes all the time. What makes this one any different?

Annabeth couldn't take it anymore and screamed:

'It's a suicide note! Percy killed himself and left a note telling us all'

and burst into tears.

As Annabeth collapsed the noises form inside the cabin ceased immediately.

Nico walked out covered in blood, reached out a hand and pulled her up into a tight hug that neither ever wanted to let go.

The next day during breakfast, Chiron had an announcement and told the room what the commotion was.

Because his closest friends were all grieving and struggling they were allowed permission to sit with each other at meals.

Nico and Annabeth got closer due to the closeness they had with Percy, they were the most upset by it and helped each other through.

'Last night as you may have heard a note was found in Percy Jackson's room. I will not tell you what it said but it was a suicide note. Percy Jackson killed himself'

The amount of gasps around the hall made it sound like a wave breaking. Murmurs and whispers started spreading across the room like wildfire and Chiron had to shout over all of them.

'There will be a memorial tonight at the bonfire for those who would like to attend. Thank you'

The centaur turned and walked away again wiping away the tear that had escaped down his face before he heard a shout.

'Chiron…'

'Hello Jason' he said as he turned and saw the son of Jupiter running towards him.

'Is that the only thing that Percy left? Just the writing on the wall?'

Chiron nodded. 'Yes. There's nothing else.'

Jason nodded, a look of disappointment plastered on his face, and walked away to catch up with the others never to realise that what Chiron had said was wrong.

Percy had left another note, under his bed that Nico had found whilst trying to find something else, but in the shock of losing his love had completely forgotten about it.

20 years later and Nico Di Angelo had never read the one thing that Percy Jason had needed him to the most.


	4. The Letter

_My dearest Nico, _

_By the time you read this I should have left and you may have already worked it out but I wanted to be the one to tell you anyway. The last few months have been really hard and I know they have for you as well but somehow you seem to be coping with it better. _

_Going through Tartarus has got to be the hardest thing I've ever done, closely followed by the countless times I've nearly lost you. When I heard that you were in a jar living off pomegranate seeds it almost broke my heart and we hadn't even told each other how we felt yet. _

_At night I still have nightmares, I don't think they'll ever stop. But the one nightmare I have most is the one where I don't get to you on time and you give up waiting for me to find you. You run out of seeds and I don't save you and you die forever thinking that I'm useless._

_I can't stand it anymore Neeks, the nightmares, the pressure of being a son of one of the Big Three, the never ending battle with the constant stream of monsters and challenges. I cant do it. I've tried so hard so act normal around you all so that none of you suspect anything but it's tiring to always hide behind a mask and sometimes I let my guard down but you always saw straight through me. I felt so weak. I've survived so much, longer than I thought I would and a simple thing like keeping my feelings in check is the biggest issue. _

_A few weeks ago I finally decided that I couldn't live like this anymore so I challenged Luke to a battle. My hope is that after I won't have to worry about any of this anymore. Luke is a strong fighter but this time I'm not going to fight back._

_I really am sorry Nico. I love you so much and I desperately wish that I didn't have to leave you but I don't know how else to carry on. I just want you to know that my favourite moments all involve you whether it's the geeky 10 year old obsessed with Mythomagic or the strong handsome, fabulous god that you are now, you are my favourite person and I'm so glad I met you. _

_We've had ups and downs but that's just made us stronger and I hope you have an amazing life. Remember I'll always be there for you whenever you need me. I love you forever_

_Stay strong my beautiful boy_

_Percy Jackson xxx_


End file.
